March 18, 2005

Take a tip from us -- or not
Let's give ourselves a breather from the life of calories and talk about something else we all struggle with from time to time -- tipping.

Here's a case study: Last summer, midway on a round-trip bike ride from Charlevoix to Bay Harbor, six of us paused at a waterfront bar for a quick soup-and-salad lunch. We weren't on a tight, work-day schedule, but we didn't want to dawdle either. Yet, dawdle we did. Even though the place was hardly busy, we waited 10 minutes just to get water, 10 more for the server to return and take our order, and another half hour before we saw any actual food. With more long waits for our separate checks and then our change, this "quick" lunch took almost an hour and a half. The server offered no explanation, and we all left grumbling. Yet everyone dutifully left the usual 15-20% tip. We still wonder if we should have.

How would you tip in a situation like that? If you believe (as many do) that the word "tip" is an acronym for "To Insure Promptness," then you might have left the server little or nothing. But what if the delay was the kitchen's fault? Well, you might reply, let the server take it up with the chef.

What we decide matters, too, in terms of the national economy. Almost 60% of us dine out at least once a month in a sit-down restaurant, and collectively we tip the nation's two million restaurant servers $21 billion a year. Since servers' outright "wages" seldom exceed $3 an hour, tips are the mainstay of their livelihoods -- and even then they often must "tip out" a share to bussers, dishwashers, even cooks.

Actually, the word "tip" predates the modern acronym era by centuries. Four hundred years ago a "tip" was a small gift to a host's servant for extra services during a visit. Some scholars think it goes back to the 1600s, when "tip" was slang for any alcoholic drink (the source, by the way, for the word "tipple"). To this day in Europe, where food service is included in the bill, diners still leave voluntary tips for the drinks (as in the German trinkgeld and the French pourboire). But such tips are small -- often just a few coins and seldom more than 10%.

In the U..S., however, many servers say they expect nothing less than 20%. The cultural norm is 15-20%, according to Michael Lynn, an associate professor at Cornell University's Hotel School. He studies diners the way Gallup studies voters, right down to exit polls outside restaurants. He may know more about tipping than anyone alive.

So here's another question for you: If you have $30 worth of food and $10 worth of wine, and your bill comes to $42.40 with tax, what's your 20% tip going to be? Is it 20% of the total, 20% of the total less the tax, or 20% on food and 10% on wine? Opinions vary. Certainly, 20% of the total is easier to compute, but should we be tipping the server for the taxes we pay? Our practice is 15-20% of the pre-tax bill. If you're so inclined, 18% is a cinch to compute in Michigan because it's simply the sales tax times three. Some folks just cant be bothered, it seems, as Professor Lynn's research reveals that one diner in five tips a flat dollar amount rather than wrestle with the math.

Even if the service really sucks, it's a good idea to tip something. If you leave no tip at all, the server might think you just forgot, but a small tip is an unmistakable rebuke.

Servers who want revenge can add your name to the national database of lousy tippers at bitterwaitress.com, a website that also maintains a gallery of cheapskate celebrities. (Another interesting, in-the-trade websites is shamelessrestaurants.com, where New York restaurant staffers go to complain about their employers.)

But before you stiff a server, remember that waiting tables is really hard work and that a server must be organized, efficient, energetic, and have a talent for communication.

And finally, for all you hungry servers out there, research suggests some ways to increase your tips. One is to crouch tableside at eye level when you introduce yourself to the customers. It's almost a sure thing. In a typical case from Prof. Lynn's studies, a waiter at a Mexican restaurant increased his average tip this way from 14.9% to 17.5%,  and a waitress in a Chinese restaurant boosted hers from 12% to 15%. If you find a server who crouches down to look you in the eye, you've probably found a real pro.

Some other tips for boosting tips:

- Touch your customers lightly on the arm or shoulder;
- Smile a lot, and be entertaining. Maybe even joke a bit;
- Write "thanks" or put a smiley-face on the check (yep, they say it works);
- Read the customer's name from the credit card and use it when you say thanks.

And finally, here's something that will probably get the PC police riled up, no matter how obvious it seems: Researchers have found that tips are significantly larger when the customer and server are of opposite sexes.